Why can’t I shout about my blog?

Why don't II’ve been writing Belle du Brighton for six years. Before that I wrote on Livejournal and prior to that on Diaryland; both sadly now long lost in the cyberspace black hole. But for some ridiculous reason many of my friends don’t know about the blog, or if they do know I blog they don’t know where. My parents don’t know, and my in laws only know because Sam or his sister told them, i’d much rather they didn’t read it and I am cringing now just writing about the fact that they read it. But WHY? Why am I so disinclined to mention it? It’s almost as if I am ashamed of it, although there is no reason to be at all. In the last six years it has grown from a little blog about what I wore and what I get up up to into something that acts as a scrapbook of our family life.

I have had some amazing opportunities and experiences through this blog, there is no denying that my children’s lives have enriched because of it; new toys, books and adventures we otherwise wouldn’t have thought to do or been able to afford to go on. I also earn a decent enough part time ‘wage’ from the blog and associated income, more than I do in my other part time job anyway! But I still inwardly cringe when someone asks about it if someone else we’re with brings it up and mutter something about ‘being a writer’. I we have something new or go somewhere to review then ‘oh I’m reviewing it for a website…’ I don’t often say it is my own website, one that I have been working to build up for years and years  and one whose audience I value. One that I have spent untold numbers of hours of my time on. Why am I not proud of it? When I hear people say they have put their blog on their CV I am amazed! Why? Because my blog holds so much personal information about me and my family, from my wedding to the births of both my children. Holidays, times when I’ve felt down and found coping hard. It’s all laid bare for anyone to see and that makes me feel vulnerable. I could of course stop posting personal posts but I don’t want to. I think they make me more relatable and without them it would just be a catalogue of reviews and opinions.

I am friends with a lot of bloggers on facebook and I see them share blogs they are proud of, or when they have giveaways running. It’s something I just can’t bring myself to do. It’s not even linked in my about me. Why? Why would it matter that people I know from school or work over the years read the blog? It really shouldn’t. Maybe I need to just bite the bullet and edit my about me to say ‘writer at Belle du Brighton’ and link to my blog facebook page. I should be proud of it, and I am but my actions don’t match that feeling. I think a lot of it stems from my pre-baby job of managing a big busy hotel, it was a really stressful job and I used blogging as a release, writing about days out, outfits and makeup when I started. I didn’t want any of my employees to read it, as I felt it would overstep the employer/employee relationship for them to know so much about me. But I stepped down from that job after my maternity leave with Athena ended in the summer of 2014, and although I still work for the same company it’s not in the same position nor in the same hotel and none of my new colleagues and I are friends on facebook.

Yesterday I shared a link to an article that I wrote and published on Huffington Post, and for me was a big deal to press ‘post’. Not because I am worried about what people will think about the article, but because at the end there is a link to my blog so anyone with a brain cell can get to it. And you know what? I had a lot of likes and comments about the article, and a couple of people even shared it, people who didn’t know I blog before I posted the link.

So I guess the next step is to overcome my completely irrational fear that someone who I don’t even really care about but am still friends with on facebook might be bothered to go back through my blog posts and read things about me and my family that are already out there on the internet to see anyway. Writing it like that makes me think what the hell am I afraid of?

Maybe I’ll just bite the bullet and do it, add my blog into my bio, tell people about it with my head held high when it comes up in conversation, heck I could even start carrying around my business cards!

If you’re a blogger do your family and friends know? Do you tell people when you meet them? Any tips to get me to stop worrying about it so much?

Sparkles & Stretchmarks Sunday Best
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19 Comments

  1. 18th August 2016 / 7:54 am

    I can TOTALLY relate to this. A few of my family members (very close ones, mind you) read the blog but I wouldn’t dare share it across my personal Facebook.

    Like you said, I’m not ashamed of my blog – far from it – I’ve written about TTC, LGBT Stuff and, of course, our son, but there’s something holding me back from sharing.

    Maybe I worry about the old, negative connotations of blogging and that people will think I’m just a loser sat behind my computer writing about the rubbish in my head, but as we all know it’s more than that now so why I can’t I do it? Maybe I worry about sharing my weaknesses.

    Maybe one day.

    Thanks for this – I loved this (and your Huff post!).

  2. 18th August 2016 / 10:09 am

    It’s definitely a tough one to publicise your own blog to friends and family and does probably end up changing your writing style a little bit! The only 2 times I’ve shared one of my own posts on my personal Facebook though have led to more page views than anything else I’ve done so it’s worth doing as long as it doesn’t become the only thing you post about! Good luck!

  3. 18th August 2016 / 2:46 pm

    I can totally relate to that. I feel like a bit of a div telling friends that I blog or talking about it. But it is hard work and takes a lot of effort and is very much a job for many of us.

    Congrats on huff post!

  4. 18th August 2016 / 4:27 pm

    This is really interesting. I found that I didn’t share anything with people I knew in the first year. Easier to share with people I’d never met somehow? Nothing wrong with telling people what you do, though – I pretty much always get a positive response x

  5. 18th August 2016 / 8:17 pm

    I think most people I know do know about my blog; I’ve no idea how many of them read it, though, and I really don’t want to know! I write as though they all do but tell myself they don’t. It does make me feel awkward – partly, I’m worried they’ll read something, assume it’s about them and take offence; mostly, I worry that the me I present on my blog (which I do think is the REAL me) doesn’t match the me they’ve got in their heads and they’ll start to think I’m fake in some way.

  6. 19th August 2016 / 12:25 am

    I understand how you feel. I have always shared from the start but sometimes wonder what it would be like if less people who know me knew I was a blogger. I guess its the fear of being judged and people thinking i get things for free when its not the case.

  7. 19th August 2016 / 9:14 am

    Ah I totally get where you are coming from, I was bricking it when I first shared my blog with friends and family it was quite early on and I tested the waters with some individually first before I just shared it on Facebook! Everyone was so supportive though I think you should go for it defo you have achieved so much and you should be really proud xx

  8. 19th August 2016 / 10:32 am

    You are 100% not alone on this. My family and close friends know that i blog and occasionally read it, but i wouldn’t dare promote or share it across my personal facebook. Like you, i’m not ashamed of my blog or anything, i think it’s just the fear of judgement from people i know maybe. I have no idea lol xx

  9. 19th August 2016 / 5:07 pm

    I too keep my facebook page and profile separate but I am not sure why…

  10. 19th August 2016 / 10:27 pm

    I can totally understand where you are coming from, but be proud and shout about it! I’m always going on about my blog to friends and family. I guess its because I’m quite shy in real life but there’s so much I want to share, so by having people that I already know read my blog posts, I suppose it makes them get to know me even more if you get what I mean! xx

  11. 21st August 2016 / 7:46 pm

    I am the total opposite! I love telling people that I blog, and all my family know; though that’s not to say any of them “get it”. My aunties have laughed at me and have taken the mickey out of me for “doing that blog” but have admitted they’ve never actually read it. The thing is, I think I’m just so comfortable and confident that I honestly don’t care who sees what. I don’t share anything I wouldn’t tell someone in person so don’t feel as though I overshare but that doesn’t mean I hold back either. It’s just a conversation I’m having with X amount of people. I even share my blog posts on my personal Facebook too so that my friends can read it. For me it’s an honest account of my life and if someone doesn’t like it, then pfft, oh well! You have an amazing blog lovely and you write beautifully, it’s something to share! xx

  12. 21st August 2016 / 8:09 pm

    My family and friends know about my blog . Most of them love the fact they can see my daughter grow up through my posts . As they arnt able to see her all the time . Hold your head high and be proud of the hard work you put in! X

  13. 21st August 2016 / 8:31 pm

    I’m fairly new to blogging but not to writing. I do think the fact it’s so personal makes it hard to share with the people that know you best. Writing is certainly my outlet. Its a very vulnerable feeling to essentially let others tune into what’s in your head. It’s like those nightmares of being naked in front of a room full of people. Laid bare for all to see. I was outed when a friend shared one of my posts and tagged me in it.
    Just popped here from UK parent bloggers and will definitely be following your blog. You write beautifully by the way.

  14. 21st August 2016 / 8:52 pm

    I do know where you are coming from, I very rarely share my blog on my personal facebook page and I’m not even sure why I don’t! I am proud of my blog (although I have let it slip a little recently) but I just sometimes feel a bit awkward that I lay myself bare I guess. Lovely post but we should all be a bit prouder of our achievements shouldn’t we. Popping over from #SundayBest

  15. Sarah - mud cakes & wine
    21st August 2016 / 9:05 pm

    I only have a very small little blog but I have barely told anyone I do it. I did a post about my little boy with type 1 and my photo was attached and a few fiends noted it was me. It felt really odd. A great post and interesting thoughts wish I could be more help ???? #sundaystars

  16. Lucy | Real Mum Reviews
    21st August 2016 / 9:09 pm

    Hell yes! Shout about it! You should be proud! They’ll always be the odd one who judges or makes a daft comment but why not be proud of your achievements?! 🙂 x

  17. 21st August 2016 / 11:52 pm

    Lauren I get this completely, I don’t tell people about my blog and like you when reviewing something I don’t say it’s on my site. I don’t know what I’m worried about I just think it’s a confidence thing. Maybe we need to be a little bit braver and more proud of our work.
    Lorraine x

  18. 27th August 2016 / 9:28 pm

    Your blog is amazing, you so should be sharing it with people. However I can totally relate to this myself, hardly anyone in real life knows I blog and those that do I don’t tell them where I blog at. I even went as far as setting up a new facebook account so no-one found out about it whic is just daft xx

  19. 27th August 2016 / 10:20 pm

    I have absolutely no advice because I am exactly the same! I’ve been blogging for about the same amount of time as you, and like you I see other bloggers sharing their posts and have their blog in their bio, but I just can’t do it. I’m scared people will just mock me! Thanks for sharing with #SundayBest, I really relate to this x

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